Morbid
A note to future-self

A note to future-self

Dear future self,

I am reckless
and I don’t know where am I heading to.

Apparently, I am coming to you,
But by the time I reach, you would have long left.

There is much that I am going through
to become you.

But as I just said, I am impulsive.
Hence my thinking needs a validation,
my actions need a justification,
and my heart needs a confirmation;
that I am on the right path.

If only you could let me know a few things…
I have made a list- would be easy for us both.

Would you tell me
if my actions are making sense out there?

Am I finally able to make the things work my way?

Am I living my dream, or still moving towards it?

Have my imprudent decisions brought out the best in me?

Have my efforts reached the benchmark of “enough” for the ones I love?

Does he love me the way I have always deserved?

Do I still dwell upon people’s thoughts;
pondering upon what they think of me?

Do I still sometimes cry silently in the dark?

Have I been living for the happiness of others, too lately?

Please tell me you are in a place where I have always wanted to be.

I need an assurance that I can resort myself to.

I need the confidence over making my own choices.

I need a verdict over my audacity.

I know it’s difficult for you,
And that you too seek for your future self.

I know, it will never ever end.
and maybe that is how things are supposed to be.

For now, I just pray that
the future self-reading this is happy
and content with each of my efforts;

And believes that I took the best possible road
to reach her.

Love,
Me.

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